Present information to the participants around attachment styles. Some salient points to make would be:

  • Attachment is the connectedness or feeling of being emotionally close to someone.
  • It is a major component of love. 
  • We learn this as children, primarily with our mother and father (or whoever brought us up). 
  • There are two essential types of attachment: secure attachment and insecure attachment. 
  • Secure attachment can be characterised by the qualities of responsiveness, positive regard, and nurturance. 
  • Childhood sexual abuse often requires children to adapt to the untrustworthiness or unreliability of adults around them, which in turn can effect trust, and the capacity for secure attachment. 
  • Attachment styles are changeable.

Utilising the handout 'Attachment styles' [Page 34 of Participant workbook], provide the following information on the four attachment styles that have been identified:

Attachment style #1: Securely attached 

  • High self-esteem and not afraid of closeness. 
  • Willing to change, overlook others faults.
  • Resolve conflict appropriately. 
  • Trusting, relaxed, always in the relationship. 
  • Healthy attachment gives a sense of safety and decreases anxiety. 
Attachment style #2: Insecure: Dismissive 
  • Fearful of emotional dependency. 
  • Limits ability for intimacy. 
  • Prone to distance in relationships. 
  • Doesn’t seek help, or alienates potential helpers.  

Attachment style #3: Insecure: Pre-occupied 

  • Low trust and high dependency. 
  • Clingy, dependent, worrisome. 
  • Loss and abandonment fears. 
  • Conflict is interpreted as less love. 
Attachment style #4: Insecure: Fearful 

  • Negative view of both self and partner. 
  • Combination of both characteristics 'dismissive' and 'pre-occupied'. 
  • Mixed feelings about relationships (the person wants emotional closeness, but fears getting too close). 
  • Difficulty trusting the intentions of partners, or depending on them. 
  • Feels unworthy of response from partner.  

Have the participants discuss the style of attachment that they grew up with, and how they see their style of attachment now.


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Last modified: Sunday, 29 July 2018, 12:22 PM